How Soon Is Too Soon?

by Eathan

The big question today is how soon is too Soon?? I’m not talking about sex or anything sexual.? Everyone knows how I feel about sexual encounters.? My question is a bit more than that.? It’s been a month or so since KT35 and I met off match.com.? We had one of the best 1st dates I’ve experienced in a while.? We shared a bottle of wine on the patio one night.? Since then I’ve gone out with her several times.? We’ve spend the night together a couple times, we’ve even spend a few hours together having breakfast together.? So I gave it some thought this weekend, how soon is too soon??

How soon is too soon to meet her kids?? How soon is too soon for her to meet my kids?? I almost solved both of those questions in the last week.? I was scheduled to do a 3k charity run with her last weekend, but 630am came quicker than I expected.? This How Soon Is Too Soon?weekend was her chance to meet my boys.? I cooked my famous Texas BBQ Ribs, with all the sides.? The plan was for her stop by and meet my boys.? But she wasn’t feeling good after her birthday party the day before.? So?we missed out, again.? Social events are usually the best time to make a introduction to kids.? From my experience, it’s easy to be the odd man out with out the kids even realizing mom or dad?has a date.? Now the challenge begins.? The challenge is to see if the two can blend.? I think I’ll wait a?few more weeks before I cross that bridge.

How soon is too soon to invite her to meet my friends?? This is one of the toughest questions for me.? My friends are a peek into my inner circle.? Over the years, my friends have only met a couple of my dates.?? I remember one of my friends who said she’s only seen me on a date 1 time.? She knows that I date, but she knows I keep my options open.? Do I really want my friends to make the association between her and I?? I actually invited her to a birthday pool party in two weeks.? I warned her that this would be a good chance to meet a few of my close friends.??This also allows me to get some extra eyes on her.??My inner circle of friends are very social.? They’ve been known to?give scouting reports to?help other friends out.? Yeah, scouting reports.? We share info when we see or hear something about someone we are interested in.? So I?before?I get too involved, I’ll know?if her intentions are true.?

It’s only been a month, but …. How soon is too soon?

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Article by Eathan

Life long interracial dater and father of two.  Currently resides in Dallas and socially active in the DFW area.  You can connect with Eathan on Twitter and Facebook.

Eathan has written 539 awesome articles.

  • @ Teacia HAHA... cages are good.. esp if they like it..lol
  • Rena
    @ Eathan - Actually, no. There's nothing about previous relationships that "IF" my friends had told me, I would have listened. Let me take that back, I would have listened simply because I have ears, but I would have questioned my friend's intentions rather than what I was told....if that makes any sense.

    You know, I don't go into relationships, especially new romantic ones, with the idea of "hmmm, what kind of dirt can someone tell me about him". If you go into relationships looking for a problem....you'll surely find it.
  • Teacia
    I say keep em all locked up in a cage.
  • @ Rena I'm sure there is something about your past relationship that IF your friends had told you... You would've been open to hear. Many wish they have the ability to do it..Only a few truly do. I don't have to wait for it to shine thru ;)
  • Rena
    Sure, I introduce people who I'm trying to develop a relationship with to my friends. My friends are a very important part of my life. But, what I don't and wouldn't do, is ever ask my friends to be my "eyes and ears" about the man I'm interested in. Maybe when I were in my teens or early 20's, but I'm 43 years old.

    My friends love me and want me to be happy and so why then would they turn around and spew negative things about a man I'm fond of and think enough of to bring around them? If I questioned his character so much that I would need an extra set of eyes much less 10 of them to "spy" and report back on what he does.....he's not the one for me and I don't care what report came back.

    I wouldn't be involved with someone I couldn't trust and if I did trust him and behaved like that......I would be a CRAZY BITCH (see your previous blog). I care more that my man parks his shoes at the end of my bed at night rather than what he did in them out on the town with his buddies some night. True colors always shine through given time but my limits are those I set, not what my friends set for me.
  • @ Rena .. you don't introduce them to your friends to get their opinion. You do that so you have a extra 10 pairs of eyes and ears around town. In your own words.. its stalking by friends..lol We call it lookin out for your friends. It's one of the dark sided things of dating in Dallas.
  • Rena
    Wasn't it just recently you decided you even felt comfortable going out on a date in public with her? Not to be critical. I think that it's great that you're mind is even thinking like this about her and that you feel a connection with someone like that. That kind of connection is always great. But, sharing breakfast and sleeping with someone no matter how good the connection, is months away from introducing someone to your kids. That's way to much way to fast, for me and my kid anyway. If you want to introduce her to your friends, then do so because you're proud and fond of someone that your seeing and trying to build something with. Don't introduce her so that your buddies or female friends can give you the 411 on her. Base your relationship with her on YOUR opinion of her not the opinion of your buddies.....that's kind of childish. You want to know if her intentions are true? Try asking her and not play games of "scouting" reports.
  • Well....My advise would have been...Let her meet your friends FIRST...a couple of times. Kids need to be the LAST, LAST to get introduced. I mean like after you two have made a committment to go exclusive...then the kids. That's my 2 cents.

    Ciao!
  • @ Missy.. well it happened since i posted silly... I think the heat has got your brain warped..lol
  • HAHA! Then take the damn post down!!!
  • @ Monique.. too late.. I met her kids today.. more details to come soon.
  • You two already did the deed so how can anything else be "too soon"? :)

    I think if you sincerely like this woman, and you are actually trying to accomplish something and start something MEANINGFUL, then you shouldn't have to ask yourself if it's too soon.

    However, if your plan to keep on continuing your wild ways, then I would suggest you just keep things as they are. No point in misleading someone so they think they mean more than what they really do.

    Moniques last blog post..Let Me Pay You So You Can Torture Me
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