Mormon Girl Returns

by Eathan

I knew the day would come where I would have to deal with Mormon Girl.? Mormon Girl was here a few months ago for her semi-annual visit.? At the end of her last visit I was left unsatisfied sexually.? Since then, she has sent me several text messages to say hi and other miscellaneous chit chat.? I’ve been cordial, but nothing sexual.? Mormon Girl’s frustration peaked a couple days ago.

I received a standard “hello” text and I replied.? She responded with, “how are you.. what have you been up to?”

My response was a normal, “hi, nothing new.. same ole shit.”

The following is the exact text I received, “that’s great…I’m not sure what i’ve done ..but i’ll leave you alone… and to think I was excited to tell you I’m flying to Dallas Monday for a job interview.? No worries.. I won’t impose.? It will be as if I don’t exist.”

Wow, she’s being bitchy.

I have to admit that I didn’t reply to that yet.? Why?? I don’t think there is any words that would change her attitude.? I have decided to wait a few days, let things calm down before I send her a email.? The problem hasn’t changed.? The sex is bad.? I’m not excited about giving Karma Sutra lessons.

42 18736444 Mormon Girl Returns

And let’s think about it.? If I give Mormon Girl Karma Sutra lessons, that means there’s still going to be a lot of bad sex in the future.? Since she only comes to Dallas twice a year, it could take 2-3 years before there’s a quality sex life.? I already know what some of you are thinking, she’s moving to Dallas.? Well, if she’s in Dallas it could still be months before she is a sexual beast.

Normally I wouldn’t have this type of conversation through email, but I think the phone conversation would turn ugly.? I’m positive that she would verbally unload on me.? And in some strange way, she would be justified to do so.? Why?? Because I didn’t mention my sexual displeasure.

As I write this, i’m trying to decide if I want to lie or make up an excuse.? I’m sure I could tell her, “I have a girlfriend.”? The problem with that I haven’t mentioned one over the last few months and I don’t make it a practice to tell lies.? My procrastination is going to bite me in the ass.

So my delima is, should you immediately express your sexual displeasure?? Would you rather have someone express their displeasure in person, email, yahoo messenger or text message?? Maybe I should tell her over drinks while she’s here.? Should I just tell her the truth or should I attempt to sugar coat it?

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Tagged as: karma sutra, mormon girl, sex

Article by Eathan

Life long interracial dater and father of two.  Currently resides in Dallas and socially active in the DFW area.  You can connect with Eathan on Twitter and Facebook.

Eathan has written 539 awesome articles.

  • Ignoring is bad. And I also agree that in this case there is no need to tell her why you're not interested. Just politely tell her you're not interested and then you are officailly excused from all future contact. Done and done.

    Although I really want to know how the bad sex topic can be broached safely with a partner you do actually like and would like to keep. I mean, surely that can be worked out somehow, right?

    <abbr>Jane Wonders last blog post..Quiz Time!</abbr>
  • I'm not sure how you bring it up safely. I'll let you know how I do it. We're friends before we got into this FWB position. But I do have a idea that she's not going to be happy.. simply for the fact that she travels so far to get here... and the lack of her sexual experience. I'm not sure she'll deal with rejection well. I guess I'll find out soon.
  • Don't tell her the sex is bad. Just tell her you feel like continuing would put a strain on your friendship and the friendship is very important to you. Seriously, in your case I would not mention the sex.

    Just trying to help here dude.

    <abbr>Jane Wonders last blog post..Quiz Time!</abbr>
  • Nephie
    Just tell her that for multiple reasons the two of you are incompatible. Age, sex quality, distance, frequency, attitudes & personalities, etc...and that right now you are not feeling up to gratuitous sex...and leave it at that...that should suffice it rests the blame equally and she should be alright....you could offer to introduce her to some of your friends....
  • That sounds like something I'll say. I haven't decided if it will be text.. yahoo.. or phone.
  • Nephie
    We do think too much alike...
  • Yeah, that 'It'll be like I don't exist' shit is lame. She's basically asking for it. She knows you want out but figures the guilt trip will get you to be like "Oh, baby, baby. You know I want you here". WEAK. The one thing my mom taught me is to know when you're not wanted and move on. That was a desperation text and it made her look worse. You and I should team up to teach a seminar. You can do your karma sutra and I can talk about how to be a woman men can respect and (hopefully) desire.

    <abbr>Julie@Cool Mom Guides last blog post..Wordless Wednesday-Ta Da!</abbr>
  • I thought that statement was lame also. Knowing her.. she did that just to say 'poor me'. I guess the fact that I didn't respond right away told her I'm not going for the guilt trip. I believe she's horny..and was throwing a tantrum.
  • Celeste
    I agree with SINgle GIRL... not much point in telling her why. Either way, you're not really going to have her as a friend in the future, because that will not satisfy her.

    I don't normally advocate this, but what would happen if you just did what most guys do?... just stop calling. Don't respond to texts or email. No, she won't be happy with that either...but eventually she should get the message.
  • Yeah...maybe I should be a dick and just ignore her calls and text.
  • Yeah, Celeste - that's exactly what most guys would do. But it's not a good thing.

    How hard it is to send a pleasant/polite text or email telling her that she's a great girl and good luck but you don't see the 2 of you together? It's take you a minute. And then if she continues to contact you - you can do the no contact thing. But I ALWAYS advocate letting someone know you're moving on. It's the mature and decent thing to do.

    <abbr>SINgleGIRLs last blog post..What's Wrong With Me?</abbr>
  • Eathan,
    If a guy told me it was over I wouldn't be texting or calling him. And if for some weird reason I did (needing to hear one last time - yeah, it's over) and he didn't reply I would take the hint and walk away. The key is to tell her it is over, first, then stop contact.

    Anyway, I just think that that's how people should treat each other. To be kind and not string each other along. It's not so much "advice" but advocating decency.

    <abbr>SINgleGIRLs last blog post..What's Wrong With Me?</abbr>
  • SINgleGIRL would it make you made if I ignored you ... and never replied?
  • I'm a big fan of honesty, as a policy. But I don't see the upside, for either of you, of you telling her why you don't want to see her anymore. Because you don't, right? If I am reading this correctly you have no further interested in this woman. Not sexual, not for a romantic relationship. So just be a gentleman and say, "you're a great girl but I just don't see us together" or something like that.

    <abbr>SINgleGIRLs last blog post..What's Wrong With Me?</abbr>
  • Yes...since the sex was bad..I don't want a relationship at all. Gotta have Great Sex!
  • I concur. It's a dealbreaker. So why are you stressing about telling her she's bad in bed? She's not your problem anymore. Let some future guy tell her.

    <abbr>SINgleGIRLs last blog post..What's Wrong With Me?</abbr>
  • Cilla
    Well, when you figure it out, let me know. I'm going through the same thing myself, although the involvement is less. Slept with someone who had me really interested, good kisser, best body of any guy I've ever been with (we're talking calendar material here)--but the sex was so-so. He's not interested in incorporating much variety into his repertoire--in fact any deviation from one position seemed to take the wind out of his sails, so to speak--and I'm one who likes to switch things up.

    I thought I was off the hook when I hadn't heard from him in a couple of days, but then I got a text from him yesterday. I know I need to respond, but I don't want to give him false optimism for the future. It seems mean to just ignore the text message, but I don't want to have a phone conversation about it either. I really can't send an email saying I've become serious with someone else, because my profile is still up on the dating site where we met, and like you, I'm not comfortable lying. Right now the only solution I can think of is to send him infrequent, very platonic text messages and do the slow fade.

    And for anyone who is tempted to lambaste me for sleeping with him outside of an exclusive relationship, I will say that I did consider him a strong contender for a LTR, but nothing can take the place of an actual test drive when you're ready to purchase a vehicle. I'm glad now we DIDN'T agree to be exclusive before sleeping together--it would have been much harder to extricate myself. OY. Am I dating like a man?
  • Yeah...I didn't think I'd have to deal with her so soon. But damn time flies. I'm going to address it in the next couple days. Or maybe I'll try the turtle technique..and hide in my shell... haha
  • Well, it's obvious you gotta tell her the truth. It may hurt her...or she'll understand. But stay true to you.

    At the end of the day, you don't want her as a partner so you have to follow through with it.

    <abbr>Infinitys last blog post..The Pick Up Artist Season Finale: Review</abbr>
  • Well said bro.
  • Hey man, I say go with the God honest raw dog truth... Tell her exactly what the problem is and what you want to do about it... If this 'jump-off' is worth saving, get ready to pull the book out lol...
  • There's not much to the situation. She's not my idea of a g/f material. I already know she's more involved than I am. So I don't think there's much to save.
  • Trust me when I tell you I know EXACTLY how you feel lol... I've been there once or twice - actually, I'm there right now with someone... I'd so much rather play Xbox then have sex with this girl lol...
  • Sounds like you got the new Guitar Hero.. or Rock Band...haha
  • Sweeeet
    T R U T H. Honesty will work well here. Be nice, just tell her you're used to a more experienced partner and at this point in your life that is what you're seeking. No need to tell her she sucked in bed, she'll read between the lines. If she doesn't, maybe she'll just move on without you having to go there! Good luck.
  • Yeah...I'm working on that. I don't want my house burnt down. You know how ya'll women can get when ya get mad at us...lol
  • Sweeeet
    No you didn't just say "ya'll" as if that was something I'd do...if it was there'd be a lot of burning down the house going on! That's why you go to them, never let them know where you live! I learned that when I couldn't get one to leave!!!!
  • That's right Ya'll... well you just a travel queen. Wait a min...I remember one time where you didn't travel. hmmm
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