As most of you read, KW44 hosted a Christmas Party this year.? It was a collection of singe divorcees that wanted to celebrate the holidays together.? By the time the party was rolling, I began to miss my old neighborhood.? It seemed to change so much in the last year.? The conversations have become much more entertaining.? KW44 and the ladies were in a full question and answer on the myths of black and hispanic men.? One of the myths I’ve been discussing with her for months is, all black men are players.
KW44 has maintained her attraction to ethnic men.? But like most women that are new at expanding their dating options, she’s apprehensive.? Since I’ve known her she’s always maintained the idea that we’re players.? I haven’t attempted to change her mind.? Instead I’ve highlighted some of the examples of why people have those views.
For example, when she goes out with her friends the black men are usually more aggressive.? That could be them wanting to ask you for your phone number and all of your friends.? I’ve always said that is a social black eye.? If you’re interested in one woman, ask for one phone number.? It’s much better if the other friends volunteer to exchange contact information.? This happened at the party on Saturday.? I was exchanging phone numbers with MS37 and MB38 when ‘Take a Hint‘ guy tried to sneak in on my conversation.? Within minutes he’s offering his phone number to MS37.? A few minutes later she asks me what his name was, because he wanted her to take his number.? She didn’t seem too thrilled.
KW44, Take A Hint Guy, MB38, MS37 & Eathan
When I’m out with my friends, I always notice the interracial couples.? I notice other black men and who they are dating.? I make a mental note.? I also notice if they are working the room like a Pick Up Artist.? Instead of being social and making friends, they are on a mission not to be the 40 yr old virgin.? If I notice this behavior, so do other women.? I have to admit there are plenty of women that just want the fun party guy.
I believe people expect black men to be players.? This could be a direct result of other black man myths.
One of the things that I have to bring to KW44′s attention is there are plenty of them in committed relationships.? Good black men (that even sounds odd) have character, motivation, passion, and loyalty for the right woman.? We can be great parents and providers.? Sometimes you have to judge a book by what’s on the pages and not what’s on the cover.
As a black man, I have always viewed relationships as air tight safe.? I don’t mind being locked away.? As long as I have plenty of love and sex oxygen to keep me alive.? If It feels like I’m going with out to suffocate, i have to escape like Houdini.
Not all black men are players.? There are as many black players as there are white ones.? We might be better at playing the game, but the ratio is the same.
Do you think black men are players?? Why do you think white women view black men as players?? Are black men that date interracially bigger players than those who don’t?
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