Comments on: Dating and STD’s

By: David

David — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 02:39:21 +0000

Honesty and openness with potential partners is of the most importance when you are single with herpes.For singles with Herpes dating is complicated. Many suffers that are single find that dating with herpes is a headache. People tend to choose others having similar interests and backgrounds. Try some STD dating site you will feel better.

By: SpoledSometimes

SpoledSometimes — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 03:05:30 +0000

Being someone who at one point had what one might consider a very liberal sex life I was always surprised to find out who didn't use protection. Choosing a path of "free" love these days and you would think that the smarts would come along with it. What I found most interesting is that the younger people were more aware of using protection, and the worry of STD's etc than people those who should have been much older and wiser. The best part of having a partner was the fact that after a dr's appointment we didn't have to worry any further about stopping by the drugstore, but the rule was that as long as we were sleeping together we were only sleeping together. Part of being single is always finding the balance of having to always be on guard and finding someone if only in the mean time that you can have that type of relationship with. BMOC is 16 and so far as only let girls blow him, which I have said is what is really best in all cases. I have however preached the safe sex talk, but at the same time made sure that he knows that he never has a reason to be afraid to talk to me about sex and what might be going on in his life. SpoledSometimess last blog post..My two cents ...

By: Dekutoski

Dekutoski — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 01:44:21 +0000

If you sleep around, unprotected, STDs are obviously a risk that is present. However, the contraction of STDS such as herpies and HPV (genital warts) aren’t always prevented with the use of a condom.

So really it’s like Russian roulett anyway, but most STDs are curable and do not cause permanent damage if treated in a timely manner.

My father died from cancer, related to AIDS, one of the gay white guys from back in the 80s. Though I have heard conflicting reports, gay/bisexual males are stil the leaders in HIV cases. But now with this “downlow brother” mess…

By: Eathan

Eathan — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 17:26:33 +0000

good advice… communicate, be alert, and get tested regularly.

By: Eathan

Eathan — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 17:23:22 +0000

I’ve had women tell me upfront… I’ve had a pissed off ex, SK31, claim I gave her something.. but I have always tested negative. Just knowing her addiction for drama.. I ignored any further contact from her.

I agree with you.. I’d like to know as soon as possible. That way you can make a logical decision based on the facts and not emotions.

Don’t be silly… Wrap your willy! haha

By: Eathan

Eathan — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 17:17:39 +0000

Sad to say, I’ve heard of people being that way. It’s really sad they aren’t more upfront.

By: Cilla

Cilla — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 16:57:22 +0000

I’m comfortable having a discussion about it, but then again, I have nothing to reveal about myself in that regard. I wonder, though, how many people routinely lie about their STD status to get someone into bed. I mean, you can ask your partner until you’re blue in the face, but if they’re not telling you the truth, you’re still at risk. I’ve had men lie about so many inconsequential things that it makes me suspicious that they would lie about STDs, as well. I don’t think it matters either whether you’re engaged in a one night stand or a long-term relationship. If someone is honest, they’re honest regardless.

Then there are the people who carry their “paperwork” around with them–reminds me of the certificates for bordetella vaccination that I keep in my car for my dogs when they have to go to the kennel LOL–and demand the same from their partners. This clean bill of health from a physician is supposed to guarantee your partner is STD-free. But it’s only accurate until he sleeps with someone who is a carrier. You can go to a doctor on Monday, get your test results on Friday, have sex with Ms.X on Saturday, and proclaim to Ms.Y the next week that you are clean, but perhaps you have contracted an STD in the interim if you are not careful. And even if you are careful, you can still fall victim to an STD. Is it realistic to get tested between every partner? For some people, yes. For others, never gonna happen, especially if insurance only covers so many visits or lab tests per year.

I don’t have any answers–just raising some questions for discussion. I think the best you can do is talk openly to your partners, get a sense of your partner’s dating history and attitudes towards sex and STDs, get tested regularly, watch for symptoms, and keep your radar up if you think a partner is not being totally honest about other areas of the relationship.

By: Steven

Steven — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 16:55:49 +0000

WOW, Robin?s post scares me. It makes me glad that I am both married and married to my wife who we have a great level of communication with each other.
Back to Eathan questions, before I got married it was a big worry. I was lacks at times, but for the most part took precautions. I did have one commented relationship with a woman that had herpes. She told me after we had been dating a while, but before we had gotten sexually active. Eathan, just like your experiences it was a very casual conversation and she was really worried that I would end the relationship once she told me since this is what had happen to her in past relationships once she had told the guy. But I was ok with it since our relationship was going great and I could see a long future with us. We did still take precautions to reduce the chances of me getting herpes. But sadly that relationship ended and I was luck to not have gotten herpes, but had to go through an exam I would not wish on anyone. She thought I had given her a STD, Chlamydia. So I went to my doctor to be full checked out. All the test came back negative for all STD?s and she told me later that it was just a yeast infection that she thought was most likely cause us having intercourse since it had been a while since she had had sex. Great, that was the most painful test I have ever been through.
Personally, I would like to know up front if the person I am dating had an STD or not. It the case above since we worked together and she had not told anyone at the office at that time that she had herpes, she held it back from discussion until we because very serious. But in general it is better to know this up front.
Eathan, tell me if you had this one happen to you before? I have one woman that I dated tell me on the first date that she was pregnant. She had just found out and was not showing yet. That was a shocker .

By: anonymous

anonymous — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 16:53:04 +0000

I was married for several years, and my husband was unfaithful. Wanting to believe in him and heal our marriage, I forgave him but made it clear any more and I was outta there. It happened again; I divorced him. But not before I learned he’d given me herpes. I’ve had no partners since then and still have not figured out how I’ll handle it when the time arrives. I know I’ll have to tell them, I just haven’t worked out when–first date? third? tenth? only when sex comes up as a viable topic?–or how. As for the ex, he has continued to seek multiple partners and I’m fairly certain he doesn’t tell them. He remarried without telling his new wife. As for me, I consider myself lucky to have gotten out before he gave me something worse. Herpes is incurable, not fatal. Had I stayed, it could’ve been HIV.

By: Eathan

Eathan — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 15:44:02 +0000

wow…. your sister’s partners have lost their minds.. that’s krazy!